John Walker's Electronic House

While common sense should assume that the Games Media Awards is incapable of doing anything without making it a murky, dubious mess, I really didn’t see how they could make a new student prize something awful. But their abilities know no boundaries.

This year there are definitely some claimed improvements. They’ve stopped PRs from voting in most categories, which is something I’ve appealed for since the awards first began. And they’ve got rid of the “goodybags”, which contained hundreds of pounds worth of items and were given to every winner. It’s great that these things are gone.

What hasn’t changed is that it’s an evening funded by publishers and PRs, in which they provide the games journalists who report on them with free food and limitless free drink, and then present them with awards sponsored by themselves. It’s promoted as a piss-up, and it has, for years, been the British games industry at its most tawdry, wretched, and dubious. From the first year’s awarding of prizes to magazines owned by the sponsors of the categories, to the despicable antics of two years ago with the Grainger Games sponsorship, to last year’s disgraceful mess of journalists tweeting adverts for games to win a Playstation, it has always been a horror show. That it has cleaned up a fraction of its act is progress, but it’s certainly not anything for celebration. That most of the UK games industry will still happily trundle along for the free booze, no matter how it associates them with it all, is hugely demoralising.

Picture nicked from the Guardian, showing the dancers at the strip club in which the first GMA took place.

And this year they’ve added the ludicrously named “Games Media Academy”. This pompously grandiose title is really just a prize for a single person – an unpaid hopeful writer – of £1000 of commissions, and some unexplained (and indeed entirely unmentioned by the actual description at the bottom of the page) “mentoring” from “some of the biggest names in games media”.

The prize is to get some paid work.

In an industry that is increasingly screwing over new writers by not paying them, some might want to argue this as a positive step. I’d suggest that’s a bit like giving a trophy to husbands who don’t beat their wives. What it is, in fact, is publishers doing their damned jobs, and pretending it’s something special. It’s like telling a plumber they’ve won the lucky prize that you’ll pay them to fix your sink.

It is a part of every media outlet’s job to find and hire new writers. Submissions arrive to magazines and websites all the time, both solicited and unsolicited. When a publication is looking for new freelancers, or even new employees, they look at these, and they commission based on potential talent they spot. People who are good enough at writing get paid work, and the system continues.

The idea of doing exactly this, but pretending it’s a special prize, simultaneously demeans both the writers submitting their work, and the entire occupation itself. It reduces our job down to a special treat, given out to one lucky person, and a ruffle of their hair. And it reduces potential writers down to entrants in a competition, and then pretends that doing the work that earns the money is some manner of award! It’s outrageous. There is NO prize! They get £1000 for doing £1000 worth of work!

So what is it really? It’s IGN, Future, MCV and bloody Network-N advertising themselves, getting their names mentioned in concert with this extraordinary act of altruism of paying some writers to do a job. The people judging may not have been so cynical in their acceptance – they may simply want to be involved in a process that finds new talent. But unfortunately, as positive as their intentions may (or indeed may not, looking at some of the names) be, they’re associated with the awfulness of the GMAs, and they’re – perhaps unwittingly – part of a non-prize that demeans everyone involved. Oh, and the winning entrants get published in a supplement in trade rag MCV, owned by Intent, who own the GMAs. Will they be paid for that publication? There’s no indication that they will.

(So what should they have done instead? Accepted nominations for a category for unpaid writers, and given the best one an award in the hope of raising their profile. Editors paying attention would look at their work, and if they liked it, commission them. Instead, because this is the GMAs, it’s become about promoting publishers in a faked act of goodwill, bullshitting that paid work is a prize, and insulting everyone involved.)

There is no obligation on anyone in this industry to attend the GMAs. If free drinks mean so much to you, crash a wedding. By walking through those doors, you endorse everything the GMAs have done, and intend to do. And for what? You don’t even get the bag of bribes this year. Please people, just don’t go.

Heaven high. It’s episode 135 of Rum Doings, in which we don’t discuss all manner of things that we end up discussing anyway. Including the Conservative’s peculiar backpeddling on gay marriage, the current state of South Africa, and the new-found potency of the cold virus.

There’s some lovely chat about Ferage, and then a review of Eurovision. You can see the 2011 opening ceremony here:

We recall the majesty of Wogan’s Web, the dreariness of Doctor Who, and John’s potential new house.

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This evening I went along to a talk, part of Bristol’s Festival Of Ideas, by geneticist Steve Jones. He’s recently published a book, The Serpent’s Promise, in which he reinterprets the Bible as a science book. It’s not as spurious as it sounds, although I’ve not read the book yet – Jones is an atheist, and was interested to investigate whether there’s any science to be found in the books, and to reinterpret the pseudo-science and historical claims it makes. Which sounds tremendous, so Laura and I went along.

The talk itself, in which Jones answered questions from a host, was a good time. It was a touch lacking in depth, a little heavy on the “buy the book in the foyer after” and a little light on the meat. But an enjoyable evening nonetheless.

One particular comment really stood out to me. It was a response to a question about whether religion made people happier, in which he explained that the data he’s seen showed that no, in fact religion fails to make people happier. Those who identify as agnostic or atheist tend to identify as happier.

And I realised a part of where this debate is going so wrong. Obviously the “Science vs Religion” discussions are far too often between those who wish to “oppose science in the name of religion” and “oppose religion in the name of science”, as if either were anything less than mad. But it’s understandable! Because the religiosity that’s presenting itself is one that absolutely should be attacked by those of a rational, scientific mind.

During Jones’ talk, it became very apparent that the version of Christianity he’s experienced, and the version that others have expressed to him, absolutely merits the dismissal and refuting it receives. A Christian doctrine that proselytises on the basis of offering “happiness” is fundamentally unrelated to the faith on which they claim to be based. Christianity sold as everything from a means to escape the pits of hell to a self-help cure for the lacklustre is a heretical misinterpretation of the most serious magnitude. This is perpetuated by both the intentionally malevolent, usually with a financial and/or power-based incentive, and the ideologically naive, people who very genuinely want to help spread something they believe to be good. This “Christianity”, the one that makes people happier, entirely merits the scorn it receives from the scientific community, and absolutely deserves to be found as lacking under any scrutiny.

It’s just, that’s not Christianity.

(continue reading…)

Heaven high. It’s episode 134 of Rum Doings, in which we don’t discuss whether it’s time for someone stood up for the rights of the white, hetrosexual male. But we do discuss John’s cold, and then a worrying return to cream teas. We explain why some people can’t be followed on Twitter, and then have a nice discussion about that nice boy, Justin Bieber. And John puts a hit out on Mark Kermode.

We announce plans to close down the Lake District, give away far too many personal details about ourselves, and predict our future leader, Prime Minister Wibblywob, leader of the Spoil Party. And once more we find ourselves upset by the ages of celebrities.

We’d really love it if you left a review on iTunes. Yes, iTunes is hideous, but reviews on there are what get podcasts more attention. After 130 free episodes, we’d love you to return the favour by writing a quick review.

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Heaven high. It’s episode 133 of Rum Doings, in which we don’t discuss whether pensioners should donate their bus passes to charity. Instead we somnambulistically chatter about sleep, poo Braille, and periods. Then Nick begins a sizeable lecture on Bach. No, don’t be scared, it’s good. Here are the links you’ll need, if you have Spotify access. Compare this with this. And this with this. And here’s Chi-Chi Nwanoku.

We express our lifelong dismay that we never married cello players, John regales his anthropological journey into ITV, and we laugh in horror at UKIP. And then we explain in detail how everything is the fault of the immigrants, especially the one that is Nick.

We’d really love it if you left a review on iTunes. Yes, iTunes is hideous, but reviews on there are what get podcasts more attention. After 130 free episodes, we’d love you to return the favour by writing a quick review.

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Heaven high. It’s episode 132 of Rum Doings, in which we don’t discuss whether teachers should stop teaching their liberal views of history. Instead we talk about the latest news in the Boston bombings, as insensitively as you might expect. And even more insensitively, the funeral of Her Royal Highness Queen Margaret Thatcher.

We learn why Nick passionately believes in the healing power of beetroot, science’s early weekend, and pupils copping off with teachers. Then we conclude by deciding to enter a polygamous Swedish marriage and Nick dies.

We’d really love it if you left a review on iTunes. Yes, iTunes is hideous, but reviews on there are what get podcasts more attention. After 130 free episodes, we’d love you to return the favour by writing a quick review.

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Or you can listen to it right here:

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Today Ben Kuchera, of the Penny Arcade Report, wrote an article in which he explained how games journalism works in relation to content and advertising. That gaming sites put up the galleries of cosplay babes because it’s necessary to fund the better, less popular content, all driven by a constant need for pageviews and unique hits. In his article, he writes as if he’s speaking for the whole industry, although excludes himself from the process. I’d like to add RPS to that exclusion list, thanks very much, because I don’t recognise a word of how he says my business works.

I’m not going to get into how RPS’s advertising works, because frankly I don’t know, and I prefer it that way. That’s all done by someone who works at Eurogamer, with whom we have an advertising partnership. We have laid down strict rules, they follow them, but how the charging works I’ve no idea.

Kuchera makes a few statements which I want to make clear don’t speak for me, or the business I co-own.

“People like to say that the games press is just chasing page views with certain stories, but let’s be honest: We’re chasing page views with every story.”

This is a very loaded statement. It’s both as banal as saying “Newspapers only include news stories because people want to read news,” and as sensationalist as saying, “They’ll do anything to make you click!” The truth is of course somewhere between. RPS, and I can only ever speak for RPS and no other gaming site, is a business. We make money from advertising, and we get advertising because we have people reading the site. So yes, we post things on RPS in order to run our business. But how that defines what you post is always the business’s choice, and Kuchera’s frequent inference in his piece that it automatically causes nefarious or unsightly content does not speak for me. If anything, at worst his article ends up being apologist propaganda for the sites that lazily rely on crude hit chasing, as if it were the only way.

(continue reading…)

Heaven high. It’s episode 131 of Rum Doings, in which we don’t discuss what to do with the interest rates. And then despite Nick’s insistence before we started recording that he didn’t want to, he then insists on talking about John’s misogyny/sexism article on RPS for about forty million years. We do also discuss other more important matters, such as The Golden Girls, accidental upgrades, and My Little Pony.

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Heaven high, listeners. It’s episode 129 of Rum Doings, in which we don’t discuss whatever happened to the dinosaurs. Instead we talk about how John is the most hated man in the world, Nick’s experiences at a comedy gig, and John is finally brought back down to Earth from his delusional celebrity.

We then play “Guess The Newspaper From The Headline”, the game that’s sweeping the nation, Nick explains why the SNP won’t win, and then there are more lessons in healthy eating from our nutritionist guru. Learn how Nick’s daughter turned into a guinea pig, the murderous ways of Ricarda Bigjoan, and some slightly more introspective discussion of the nature of bullying of trans* people. And bad laughers.

We’d really love it if you left a review on iTunes. Yes, iTunes is hideous, but reviews on there are what get podcasts more attention. After 100 free episodes, we’d love you to return the favour by writing a quick review.

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To get this episode directly, right click and save here. To subscribe to Rum Doings click here, or you can find it in iTunes here.

Or you can listen to it right here:

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We’re back, back, back. It’s episode 129 of Rum Doings, in which we don’t discuss how all this snow cuh global warming! Instead we talk about the silliness of condemning bacon, the sugariness of Coca Cola, and then we partake in the Pukka Bath Quiz.

As per usual, Nick insists on talking about videogames, and the SimCity nonsense. And then John explains how forgetting a bag literally led to a matter of life or death. We discuss death, and being old, and how our parents are never allowed to die.

We’d really love it if you left a review on iTunes. Yes, iTunes is hideous, but reviews on there are what get podcasts more attention. After 100 free episodes, we’d love you to return the favour by writing a quick review.

Make sure to follow us on Twitter @rumdoings. If you want to email us, you can do that here. If you want to be a “fan” of ours on Facebook, which apparently people still do, you can do that here.

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Or you can listen to it right here:

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