John Walker's Electronic House

After a strange morning of my blog going mad, updating to the latest WordPress seems to have fixed that. So now I can tell you all about a new piece up on Eurogamer, discussing the completely lovely Crayon Physics Deluxe.

In my house we have a phrase. Well, in my house we have about four hundred phrases, including, “Mmmm-mmmm, so good”, “That light bulb had one day left ’til retirement”, and “Shotgun!” But today we’re discussing “PHYSICS!”

This phrase is shouted at specific moments, rather than some sort of Oxbridge version of Tourette’s. It’s when we drop something, or something falls over, or the cat falls off his elaborate cat tree. Anything that exhibits the properties of gravity will be met by this cheer. And why? Because physics are best. And that, in a big way, is why Crayon Physics Deluxe is looking so great.

Best comment so far:

“I tried the demo and found it charming but nothing more than a tech demo. And a simple one if that. Charm can only go so far.”

I tried some baked beans once, but they were only baked beans, which is a bit of a major failing I think.

Gots me a review on EG this afternoon.

It’s the completely splendid, spend my entire time playing, has replaced sleep, Illust Logic + Colourful Logic.

Hudson Soft does it again. Picross, done perfectly. Trying to fathom the logic of UK games publishers, and that none of them have picked up the Hudson Soft Puzzle Series, will only hurt your brain. A collection of the most sublime puzzlers, fearfully and wonderfully made, so very perfect for the DS. It only gets more bemusing when you realise that most of these games – Sudoku, Akari, Kakuro, Picross, and of course Slitherlink – appear in national newspapers, magazines and probably the backs of shampoo bottles. Do they not like making money or something?

When looking to stay somewhere in Bath, perhaps don’t stay here.

Four hundred and sixteen years ago, I wrote about the NBC micro-series Thank God You’re Here. The model is: guests are dressed in a costume and sent into a room they know nothing about, and have to improvise their way through a scene with the regular cast. It ran for only a few weeks, and hasn’t been picked up since. Dave Benson-Phillips was a hopeless host, with the wonderful Dave Foley wasted as the so-called judge. Where it did succeed was the regular cast’s ability to cope with the guest changing things, quick to adapt the scene appropriately.

Already an import from Australia, it’s now reached the UK, with little changed but for only one host, Paul Merton. And rather bizarrely, it’s on ITV1. Presumably part of Grade’s attempts to rejuvinate the channel, it’s a good purchase, but peculiarly delivered.

The first show’s guests were a mixed bunch. John Thompson and Ben Miller were the comedian contingent. Then there was Australian radio presenter (and let’s assume veteran of the format) Hamish Blake, and the mystifying selection of Fern Britton.

So it was an odd surprise that Britton was, by leagues, the funniest. And that’s not a slight on the others – Blake was very funny in his scene, and Thompson got in a few good gags. Fern Britton, out of nowhere, was superbly quick and remarkably amusing. Ben Miller, however, was not. One of the most irritating aspects of NBC’s version is the constant insistence that the guests make a big fuss about how terrified they are. The same was attempted here, but only Miller seemed genuinely frightened. So much so that he blanked his way through the most piss-easy scene of being a Star Trek-style captain – ten thousand easy jokes available to anyone, and he found none of them.

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I love the idea of people coming to this site via Private Eye, and discovering that I mostly write about TV no one cares about, rant about idiots, and post videos of joy like this:

I don’t care what you think of me. I’m excited.

Will Arnett as KITT!

People may be interested to have a look at page 11 of the new Private Eye (ish 1201).

The original obit to Greening is here, my comments on the emails are here.

You might have gone through today forgetting to be scared of Fox News.

I’m not going to deny it. I’ve been looking forward to this since it was first announced back in November or so. Not because I thought it was going to be good. Oh no. But because I knew it was going to be ridiculous.

I loved American Gladiators. You’ll understand that I was about 12 at the time. I discovered it when staying over night at my friend Mark Arden’s house. We were proving our immortal strength by trying to stay up all night, aided by flicking through late-night television nonsense. I believe that evening we watched the film Elvira. Yes, that sort of 12-year-old boys type of night. So 3am comes along, and we’re weary. We’re ready to give in. And then on ITV comes something called American Gladiators. It’s already amazing by name alone. Just imagine being 12, and discovering the pure, ludicrous nonsense that is Gladiators – the bravado, the presentation, and the It’s A Knock Out With Weapons games. It was like discovering a new room in your house, filled with sweets and arcade machines.

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You can read the full, unedited exchange, here:

A comment appeared on my obit for Kevin Greening (I’ve removed it since) asking me to email the poster, one Daniel Cochlin, stating that he’s a journalist. I did, teasing him slightly for failing to find my email address so subtly hidden on the right of this page. I asked how I could help.

“Sorry, it had been a long day. I work for the — and am looking to find out what Kevin’s address was and who his partner was. All info would obviously be treated in the strictest confidence and we do offer cash for info recieved. Could you get back to me ASAP on email or on 078—? Thanks”

Mmm, how tasteful. I replied,

“I’m sorry, but I cannot in good conscience do anything that would aid the —. While I’m aware that many of the people writing for the paper are perfectly decent, the paper is certainly not. It’s a nasty, dangerous thing.

I’m a little concerned as to why you are trying to track down his address and private life. Kevin kept such details very private for a good reason – he found fame embarrassing, had no desire to have his private life in the limelight, and I cannot think of a positive reason why you would wish to have this information.

I see that you write many gossip articles. I can only request that you give a decent man his dignity.

If you would like a quote about him, or what he was like to work with, I’m certain there are very many colleagues who are far more press-savvy than me, who would be willing to share with you what a good guy he was. My comments about him are in the public domain on my blog.

Sorry I can’t be of more help,”

I did my research, obviously, and found out that the man who had contacted me regularly writes invasive gossip stories, and there was no reason to think he was aiming to write anything positive. I received a reply.

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