John Walker's Electronic House

Rum Doings Episode 77: A Cheeky Suggestion

by on Jul.08, 2011, under Rum Doings, The Rest

In episode 77 of Rum Doings things return to normal. Just John, Nick, a bottle of rum and a microphone. Aaaaand relax. So we don’t discuss: is yet another washed out, rainy British summer the final nail in the coffin of the global warming conspiracy.

There’s some familiar complaining about how rubbish our listeners are, which somehow takes us into a dangerous new territory of telling jokes. This has portent. Fortunately we’re diverted by Nick’s exciting throat news, and then Nick ATTACKS John over how hard John works on this podcast, because Nick is a BUMFACE.

We voice some thoughts on mobile phone hacking, and then get onto grammar, which takes us to Nick’s education, and the books we were taught at school. Encounters of racism in childhood lead us back to horrendous jokes, and the floodgates are open. A diversion into the remake of Dambusters, and the nature of the n-word, then offending the religious.

Please consider writing a review on iTunes. It’s a really good way of raising our profile. And keep on tweeting and so forth.

Oh, and at least leave a comment, you heartless bastards.

Make sure to follow us on Twitter @rumdoings. If you want to email us, you can do that here. If you want to be a “fan” of ours on Facebook, which apparently people still do, you can do that here.

To get this episode directly, right click and save here. To subscribe to Rum Doings click here, or you can find it in iTunes here.

Or you can listen to it right here!


44 Comments for this entry

  • Daniel Rivas

    The Jesus-figure in Lord of the Flies is surely Simon, who dies for their sins and doesn’t make a blind bit of difference. I always thought that book took a rather dim view of Christianity. The naval officer seems more to represent civilisation than anything supernatural—and there’s a nice irony in his being a naval officer, employed in his own savage farce of a nuclear war.

    I agree it doesn’t work especially well as a novel, though; it exists to be a moralising allegory, and it’s too precise at it. Plus, nobody likes to be preached at.

    And ghosts only eat ghoul-ash, obviously.

  • Nick Mailer

    Enjoy the conversation on @rumdoings where a po-faced listener accuses us of being unacceptably racist and transphobic. I await similarly-grounded accusations that we also promote rape and approve of paedophilia.

  • Xercies

    I tried to read the novel actually and i couldn’t even get past the first chapter, it was way to dense and really if you already know where its going because its been redone and paradied so much in popular culture then the book is a right turnoff since its so…uninteresting.

  • Edgar the Peaceful

    I guess you don’t get many comments because people don’t want to be cut down by your caustic wit. Also, you’re such grammar freaks they’re afraid their text will be forensically examined.

    I love you for it though.

  • Nick Mailer

    I might politely suggest a comma between “freaks” and “they’re” ;-)

  • Edgar the Peaceful

    Haha, yes. Schoolboy error.

  • Daniel Rivas

    I dunno, I mostly don’t comment because I can’t be bothered or I haven’t listened to the episode.

    Xercies: I think I like it more than you did; Rites of Passage is much better, though.

  • James Campbell

    Darkness Visible is the only Golding worth reading.

    Much like Mr. Rivas I rarely listen to the show in the week it’s out nowadays and it seems a bit pointless to comment later on. Regarding Nick’s disbelief that there were so few comments when they spoke to such interesting people last week; I actually find the episodes in which you talk to some famous sort to be of the least interest. This is despite the fact that (aside from that fellow who writes terrible radio comedy) they’ve all been people who I was aware of and interested in. I don’t mean this to be a slight against your “interviewing” but I find them too busy and too Mailery.

  • Theoban

    Well I rarely leave comments just because I wouldn’t like to bother anyone, I enjoy Rum Doings and I wouldn’t ask for anything to be changed, I enjoy the banter between two friends. I hope this message helps fill that empty comment hole in your hearts.

  • Theoban

    I sound rather upset there, I do apologise, that was not my intent. Let me say this; should you be in Ireland for any reason I will furnish you with rum.

  • kalidanthepalidan

    Q: What did the ghost say when he won the prize?

    A: “Boo”-ray!!!

    Joke solved. Best joke ever.

  • Xercies

    To be honest i don’t comment much on the interviews because you have said all the smart things that need to be said.

    Also for some reason those terrible ghost jokes really cracked me up and I was laughing so hard throughout that bit…I don’t really know why.

  • Quinn

    Surely, the form of public transportation used by ghosts would be the boo-us.

  • Quinn

    Oh, dear lord. I just read @rumdoings. I mean, there’s being painfully literal minded, and then there’s THAT.

  • Alex Bakke

    I am confused as to how laughing at someone who has made the choice to become trans-gender is racism.

  • Nick Mailer

    And if you listen, we weren’t laughing at them for their choice of taking a new gender role: we were talking of the ones who do it incompetently and end up looking like drag queens. Just as we would find risible someone who did a ludicrously bad combover to cover his bald spot. Or wore an idiotic toupee.

  • Chris

    Good episode, as always! :)

  • Sam

    Taking Italian in high school taught me the subjunctive mood and now I can also appreciate in English. Had I not taken the subject, then I would be as clueless as John.

    I can’t remember anything else that happened in this episode because all I can think of is Thank Boo. Why on earth would you end with that? It’s negated any good discussion that might have happened.

  • boaby

    hello, i like your podcast but i have nothing to say. you’re doing fine.

  • mister k

    As a frequent commenter I feel no guilt at your nagging.

    On the phone hacking stuff, while I agree that they should have got up in arms in ’09, a dead person’s phone is clearly substantially worse than a celebrities, and the fact that their moral compass had decayed enough that they thought it was fine to hack (allegedly) 7/7 victim’s families phones… thats more than a lot wrong. Its not the worst thing in the world Nick, but its pretty damn bad, and its clearly substantively different an issue to super injunctions. When private organisations are doing things governments need specific permissions to do, theres something a bit messed up.

    I also read Great Expectations and Merchant of Venice. I think its striking that in the former that the only people who are truly happy are those who accept their fortunes, like Joe and Herbert, and the unhappiest are those who dare to change their lot, like Pip. For the MoV I wrote an essay on whether Shylock was a victim or a villain (the answer, was, of course, both yes, and no), although I’m of the opinion that Shakespeare, being a man of his time, was a big ol’ anti-semite and we just choose to play Shylock as a tragic character now because of liberal guilt. Which is actually fine- why not re-interpret the play to give it a much healthier message?

    The @rumdoings person is a bit silly on racism, but I sort of agree on transphobia. I get that its very easy to laugh at transgendered people who dress badly, but isn’t that a rather easy target. Just as you discussed non-black people being able to say the n word, its a question of power here, and transgendered people are pretty fucking marginalised- even a lot of radical thinking will tend to discriminate there, so I don’t think its a healthy place for humour. However, that ‘cast was way back now anyhow…

  • groovymann

    Firstly the ghost would say;
    Given how you beg for feedback, I have none of any use aside from that Rum Doings is a brilliant podcast; quite possibly the best podcast.

    Also John should watch this,
    don’t ask questions, just watch.

  • nerdware

    Darkness Visible was wonderfully weird, so I loved it. The weirdest and most wonderful thing about it is how the third part is full of all of the dull non-weird characters, so its pretty weirdly like real life…except for that totally bonkers ending. That’s not a spoiler BTW – it makes absolutely no sense at all – unless I missed something…

    My fav scene is when the narrative switches briefly to Matty’s journal. Then it switches to the person who finds him…Hilarious. Bonkers, too.

    On my list of Weird Books, Darkness Visible is #1.

  • Colthor

    Ghosts’ public transport is the toooOOOOooOOooobe.

    Episode 76 was a good episode, but I didn’t comment because I didn’t have any interesting observations or comments to make. Also, my first listening was of the Rum Doings Vs. Google Woman “Satnav” remix, which loses something I think.

  • Patrick

    The 2006 film “Amazing Grace” has a white peer uttering the line “Tarleton! Fetch my nigger!” and then wagering said slave on a card game. It’s in an impeccable historical context of the british abolition of the slave trade, though. Released uncensored in the UK and US. The gasps from the prim middle-aged ladies there for the period drama was most amusing. As all good scotsmen do, I agree with Nick. Any chance to bring the mistakes of history back out of obscurity is worth taking.

  • James B

    I’m sorry that I haven’t told you that I love you recently.

    It struck me that I’ve listened to hours of you guys chatting and don’t have the least idea of what you look like. Other than John being fat, obviously. And presumably shrouded in crosses and whatnot.

    So, official photos somewhere please because it would be nice to put faces to your voices.

    As a bonus this will also serve as a handy targeting guide for those sensitive flowers offended by your vicious and unrepentant racism/whatever-ism of recent episodes.

  • Colthor

    You can see a John in a documentary about his pro-adventure-gaming career here:

    Although the aspect ratio looks wrong, and the original on RPS is dead.

  • Geetoo

    James B: It would be interesting if you were to describe (or even draw) what you think J&L look like without looking at photos. A fun experiment on preconceptions.

  • Geetoo

    J&N even

  • Nick Mailer

    Here’s a photo of John with his nephew:

    Here’s a photo of me in Norway as a pack-mule for my daughter:

  • James Campbell

    James B

    I posted this before but iff you’re wondering what Nick looks like:
    (He’s the one holding the book)

  • Nick Mailer


  • Daniel Rivas

    He’s the one with the plaque.

  • Fiyenyaa

    You look about 30 years younger than I imagine you to look, Nick (assuming you are the one in the giraffe t-shirt). I realise that would make you very young indeed, but I’m still bemused.

  • James Campbell

    He’s the one holding the book!

    Also: “The Positive Internet Company runs the jellycast service. We have a decade’s experience of giving popular media sites a home on the Internet, including infrastructure for Sky TV…”

    Sky TV…
    Sky TV?

    Oh, Nicholas.

  • Nick Mailer

    You’ll be happy to know we no longer support Sky, but do the BBC.

  • Edgar the Peaceful

    What about the Conservatives then, eh? And EUROPCAR!?

  • Gassalasca

    If you do a Google Images search on Nick Mailer you’ll find a couple of photos where he doesn’t look 15.

    Although even there… remarkable youthfulness. Go go Mailer genes.

  • James B

    I’m sensing that an Alas Smith and Jones parody photo might work quite well…

  • John Walker

    Nick is definitely the one holding the book.

  • James Campbell

    Thanks for confirming John, I was beginning to doubt whether he was.

  • Nick Mailer

    Fair enough. And here’s a more recent photo of Walker:

  • Tom

    How did the ghost win the prize in the first place?

    By keeping possession of the ball.

  • Alex

    Who needs preachy dystopian novels in school when you can have a moralising take on racism and exclusion with The Chrysalids?